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Bigfoot is so hard to find because he know's Chuck Norris is still alive.
Chuck Norris and Superman once fought each other on a bet. The loser had to start wearing his underwear on the outside of his pants.
Chuck Norris can dry clothes underwater.
Chuck Norris died 20 years ago, Death just hasn't built up the courage to tell him yet.
Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. You answer the wrong phone.
Chuck Norris doesn't have an ESC key on his computer, no one ever escapes.
Chuck Norris gets the Sunday papers on Thursday
Chuck Norris has a grizzly bear carpet in his room. The bear isn't dead it is just afriad to move.
Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life.
Chuck Norris killed 2 stones with 1 bird
Chuck Norris once played ping pong against himself for 11 hours straight. He quit because the paddle died.
Chuck Norris once urinated in a semi truck's gas tank as a joke....that truck is now known as Optimus Prime.
Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack. His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.
Chuck Norris won the World Series of Poker using Pokemon cards
Contrary to popular belief, Chuck Norris cannot fly. He just jumps and chooses when to come down.
Death once had a near-Chuck Norris experience
Fear of spiders is aracnaphobia, fear of tight spaces is chlaustraphobia, fear of Chuck Norris is called Logic
Ghosts sit around the campfire and tell Chuck Norris stories.
Some magicans can walk on water, Chuck Norris can swim through land.
The Guinness Book of World Records is actually Chuck Norris' elementary school report card.
When Chuck Norris does push-ups, he isn't lifting himself up. He's pushing the earth down!
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
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